Tuesday, July 7, 2009

ROMANCE MATHEMATICS




Smart man + smart woman = romance

Smart man + dumb woman = affair

Dumb man + smart woman = marriage

Dumb man + dumb woman = pregnancy

_____________________ _________



SHOPPING MATH


A man will pay RM20 for a RM10 item he needs.

A woman will pay RM10 for a RM20 item that she doesn't need.


GENERAL EQUATIONS & STATISTICS

A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend.

A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

_____________________ ________


HAPPINESS

To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a little.

To be happy with a woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand her
at all.

LONGEVITY



Married men live longer than single men do,

but married men are a lot more willing to die.

____________ ______! ___ _________

PROPENSITY TO CHANGE


A woman marries a man expecting he will change,

but he doesn't.

A man marries a woman expecting that she won't change,

and she does.

_____________________ ________


DISCUSSION TECHNIQUE


A woman has the last word in any argument.

Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.

_____________________ ________


HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED


Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking

me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next."

They stopped after I started doing the same thing

to them at funerals.